Life Coach extraordinaire, Carole Ann Rice, talks about resilience being the key to getting through tough times, and some top tips on how to build this up in your own life.
You know you’re having one of those months when the crow’s feet have turned into vulture’s claws, the weirdo on the bus moves away from you when you sit down and the Big Issue salesmen toss a pound in your direction when they see you coming.
Oh don’t. Me too. A month that would make Stephen King wince and worst of all almost all of it entirely of my own making. Ouch. But you get times like that don’t you? Mervyn King on Desert Island Discs recently commented that no one could predict the worldwide downturn in the global economy. What no one?
Not a single economist, banker, financial forecaster from JP Morgan to Goldmann Sachs couldn’t see coffers were about to make a seismic downslide and cause a worldwide recession? Makes you think, doesn’t it, just how little we can predict or control the future? How little we know what’s round the corner be it good or oh, don’t go there.
There are no guarantees except perpetual change.
We’re all having to dig deep these days. But not just profoundly into our pockets but into our psyches too, to help mend and make do in uncertain times. Redundancy, relationship crises, health issues, and financial worries are becoming an increasing life burden.
When the future is foggy we struggle to find a rock to cling to. We want black and white answers, when 50 shades of grey offers an unexciting and altogether unsexy prospect. So the buzzword to hold on to is 'resilience'. Simply put, it’s the ability to draw into ourselves to find the reserve we need to help us through tough times.
Easy to say but not so straight forward to apply when you feel like jelly and you find yourself on shaky ground. Where’s the core foundation to draw upon?
You have to have faith in your own instincts and abilities which will help guide you along the way and the goal in mind that things will get better as you take the baby steps each day towards it. Coaching is great for this.
Digging deep into hitherto unknown reserves of self is what Japanese author Haruki Murakami writes about in his book on spirituality, philosophy and marathons What I Talk About When I Talk About Running. Here he explains how he trained himself to be a marathon runner after smoking over 40 cigarettes a day, and how he became an award winning writer after a random thought occurred to him while drinking beer at a baseball game.
He honestly reveals what he has to do to achieve these things, as he says, without any great innate gift and what he draws upon to do that. Ordinarily we don’t have to dig that deep for our everyday lives but it is worth creating systems which you can turn to when you feel the ground shaking and your nerve heading for the Exit.
Here are a few coaching tips to help consolidate resilience.
- Maintain good relationships with your family and friends, and accept their help in times of stress. Also, getting involved in community groups for spiritual support too.
- Try to look at the big picture of life, and avoid viewing difficult times as insurmountable. Take small steps toward your goals and take one day at a time.
- Accept that change is a part of life, and acceptance of what is - is key.
- Keep working toward your goals every day, and ask yourself "What can I do today to move in the direction I need to go?"
- Maintain a positive view of life and visualize what you want.
- Remember how you survived a tragedy or crisis in the past. Many people report having more confidence in themselves after a crisis and some even have a deeper appreciation for life. You did it then, you can again.
- Take care of yourself. Eat well, sleep and exercise to keep yourself healthy. This is especially important during times of stress.
And decide – you will prevail. Even this will pass.
Another sure fire way of developing some psychic superglue is to hire a coach. Book your 30 minute free trial telephone session today by emailing me on firstname.lastname@example.org
To connect with Carol Ann, give her a shout on any of the following: